Specialisms

As human beings we experience losses and change from birth as part of our development as well as what we experience in our lives. They can be confusing with intense feelings or bring vagueness and a lack of feeling or meaning.  Sometimes events typically celebrated also bring great loss - such as marriage or the birth of a child.  Perhaps you recognise a few in this list and perhaps there are things you have never had.  

Sense of who you are or what you want/need
Sense of home, roots, a place that was special to you
Sense of soul, connection with others, understanding of the world, sense of belonging
Confidence, inspiration, vision, hope, dreams, joy
Purpose, meaning, what matters, beliefs, faith, spirituality
Job, role in life, security, safety.
Your own health or the health of another; capacities or abilities, voice, vision, sight, hearing, memory.
Relationship break ups, ageing, life stages, fertility
Bereavement for example a parental figure, spouse, child, miscarriage, friend, partner, animal friend or those who touch us that perhaps that we never met.  

In therapy we can take time with your unique experience - and often there may be multiple losses as one acts as a catalyst or brings with it others. I aim to offer you the opportunity to connect with and express all that arises which might feel like a crisis on all levels.  Our work may involve recognising the loss, honouring your response (which might include for example anxiety, guilt, anger, rage, relief, numbness, sadness, pain or bring existential life questions), offering space for conflicting or confusing parts and working with things unfinished.  Going through this process can bring a sense of understanding for who and how you are in the world now.

If you have grown up with these experiences it can be difficult to know whether you or what you are experiencing is normal.  Perhaps you find yourself doubting yourself, wondering what is real? Being very careful about what you do or say? Frightened you are going crazy? Perhaps you aren't sure of who you are or what you enjoy anymore?  Difficult to know who or what you can believe in?  Maybe you feel you have always struggled to cope in life.

Sometimes abuse/neglect is overt and other times it can go unseen with effects on physical, emotional, mental and spiritual levels.  In therapy you may know you want to bring and have memory of experiences of abuse/neglect or it may be you want to bring the impact it has on you.  It isn't necessary for us to speak about what you have experienced unless you want to.  I am trained to work with developmental trauma, rage and shame which often arise in this work.

Perhaps you find you are affected by things more than others seem to be?  Do you prefer quiet and less chaotic environments?  Are you impacted strongly by your experiences?  Easily overwhelmed? Perhaps you've been told you are `too sensitive', `thin skinned' or often feel hypersensitive in response to others. 

Those who are highly sensitive can find it difficult to process all they experience so may seek to de-sensitise or even isolate themselves in order to reduce what they are exposed to.  In therapy you can take time with what you experience and the impact it has on you, often emerging with new found ways of relating with yourself, others and life.

On hearing the word trauma it is common to think of adverse and often extreme events - and whilst it certainly includes these things, my understanding is that trauma is our emotional, mental and physical response to an overwhelmingly painful and stressful event.   Typically this means we are disconnected from safety, our ability to cope or others who could help us and this can happen in situations which don't appear to be major adverse events - it can happen in our every day lives and when we are growing up and through no fault of our caregiver.

In therapy you need not have a cognitive memory of your experience and together we can work from where you are which may be an acute feeling (even of disconnection) or be more vague.  Through our work together you can come to reconnect, experience safety and feel more resourced.  I also hold an understanding of the impact our early experiences in the womb or in birth may have on us. 

I have an understanding of and respect for other holistic health modalities including osteopathy, homeopathy, craniosacral therapy, nutritional therapy, acupuncture and massage.  Sometimes, intense thoughts, physical sensations, memories or feelings can arise in response to treatments.   In therapy you can bring all of these experiences and my theoretical approach aims to facilitate connectedness on all levels - you can be reassured I will not seek to interpret any physical symptoms.  

I have an understanding of the profound impact our pets can have in our lives and how important it is for that to be appreciated and understood by professionals offering support.  It can be difficult to explain or describe to others.  As a counsellor and pet `owner' myself, I can offer support at difficult times for example of chronic diagnoses, emergency situations, bereavement, witnessing ageing or changes in family dynamics (for example with loss or gain of pet).